This is No Competition

 I've come to realize why I get so competitive in drawing and social media. I always unintentionally imagine myself competing with other art people in the internet. Its not on purpose. I'm always living with that "hey, this asshole is better than me" or "hah! this jerk is not good enough, why people like them??", and such. Like if everyone is on purpose getting better to try to fuck over me, and I answer by getting better just to fuck with them.

But the reality is that I realized... nobody actually cares. Or should care. This is NO competition. No one is trying to undermine me. Everybody grows artistically to prove themselves, on their own, to get better, because they enjoy drawing, they enjoying doing art stuff. And if I have no "enemies" or "competition", here's the other realization: I'm not competing with anyone, and I need competition so my brain doesn't realize that the one holding me back is myself.

I AM the one who I should be competing against. In a friendly way. Getting better and better everyday, because I love drawing. I ADORE drawing. Its my passion, my life. Its not a competition, it nevers was. No one is taking away works from me. No one is making me lose work. I AM the one who should be pushing myself to be better and get better. 

This is no competition. No one hates you. No one hates me. I should love myself. I should love what I do, just for the sake of doing it.