Woke up with a broken wing

 That's a very sweet phrase that my mom says, and I instantly know exactly what she means and how it feels. "Waking up with a broken wing" means that the melancholies and sadness are really intense this morning, and that we rather stay in bed even if we have stuff to do. A bout of depression, in short. Waking up wishing you were asleep again, and that it was sunday, and that nothing and no one should bother you today, and that you don't have to fight to survive and do stuff because right now none of that matters shit.

I was both surprised and not surprised to learn that both my mom and dad suffered from depression and emotional issues when they were young. Surprised, because I grew up thinking, like all children, that they were the perfect people, until I learned more about how they really were, and learned they're as human as we are all. And I was not surprised, because it perfectly explains, well, everything. Everything in my life, and how I am.

I woke up thinking I'm wasting my time and my life and that nothing I'm doing matters shits and that I rather stay in bed that confront every single fucking day and hour life.

Tomorrow, I don't know.

But.

Today, I woke up with a broken wing.