You Forgot It In People

Its like a cruel irony, when people that do the abuse totally and completely forget about what they've done, and only the abused remembers it, because its part of their past, of their trauma, of their whole life. I have exes that would absolutely blush or get angry if I ever tell them that what they did or said was wrong. No, that didn't happened, you're imagining it, was that me? That mustn't been me, you're wrong. Its part of growing up, accepting that you're not perfect, and you can hurt people as much as you love them. If there's something that really makes me a little mad, is that some people try to avoid paying for consequences, or apologizing, with empty promises of "growth" and "being a new person", because of course awesome yeah cool, you're a new person, a new you, you grew up and matured and became an awesome person, and how about those others you abused, treated really shitty, badmouthed or even forgot about them? Fuck them, am I right? But good for you, that grew up, and became a shiny new person. That's a little part of Catholicism that complements that and makes me mad too, when devoted people ask God for forgiveness and pray and self-flagellate, but how about asking people on Earth about forgiveness, too? If there's an Almighty God, he will forgive you in the blink of an eye, but people on Earth who suffered your general assholeness are waiting for you to kneel and ask for forgiveness too. That kind of "nebulous general forgiveness", in my opinion, is wrong. You shouldn't spend the rest of your life doing shitty stuff, and then in a dark corner of your room, think "oh no, I was so wrong, I promise to be better", repeat your shitty attitude and expect people to forgive you without even knowing if you either really repent or if you actually are ashamed of what you've done.

If you really love people, and want to be a better person, forgive yourself, and ask for forgiveness from others, those who you treated terribly, and feel your actions, feel their words and how your attitude affected them, and grow, and become and better person, and try your best to not be your old bad self, not because you're evil, but because being human is learning over and over, and then, yes after all that, then you can be forgiven.

You are forgiiiiven